Novel Friendships for Pastors’ Wives – Ryanne Molinari

Long before I married a pastor, I was steeped in the fellowship of pastors’ wives. Mrs. Allan taught me that beauty is a wonderful apologetic. Mrs. March taught me to combat anxiety by keeping active. Mrs. Collins taught me that contentment is a matter of choice.

Here’s the twist, though: these women don’t exist—at least, not beyond printed pages and the imaginations of countless readers. The pastors’ wives who populate novels such as Anne of Green Gables, Little Women, and Pride and Prejudice are some of my oldest companions. From reading and rereading their stories, I’ve gleaned true and timeless wisdom that I draw on again and again in my life and ministry. Theirs is a fellowship I cannot recommend highly enough.

Pastors’ Wives in Literature

Books such as On Reading Well by Karen Swallow Prior and Recovering the Lost Art of Reading by Leland Ryken and Glenda Faye Mathes emphasize the formative power of reading fiction. Great novels offer examples to emulate and avoid, advice to apply, and insight into human nature that helps us understand and navigate relationships. While we may tend to rely on nonfiction for mentorship and guidance, we shouldn’t be afraid to read stories that both minister to our imaginations and contribute to our character.

While we may tend to rely on nonfiction for mentorship and guidance, we shouldn’t be afraid to read stories that both minister to our imaginations and contribute to our character.

When facing difficulties or simply day-to-day life as a pastor’s wife, I know countless resources are available to me. Nonfiction books and ministry communities abound, for which I’m thankful. However, when I simply need encouragement and refreshment, I often return to novels in which pastors’ wives figure as characters.

In Pastors in the Classics, Leland Ryken, Philip Ryken, and Todd Wilson explore the literary canon and share wisdom for pastors derived from their fictional counterparts. I’d like to offer a few reading recommendations for pastors’ wives that I’ve found at once enjoyable and edifying.

1. Anne of Green Gables by L. M. Montgomery

Mrs. Allan, the wife of a young minister, is a background character, yet she leaves an indelible mark on the story’s heroine. Mrs. Allan stands as an example of gentleness and intentionality. It’s bittersweet, though, to read this story knowing that the author later married a pastor and didn’t find the same joy as her characters.

2. Little Women by Louisa May Alcott

Margaret “Marmee” March holds down the fort while her husband serves as a Civil War chaplain. Her motto “Hope and keep busy” wards off many a moment of anxiety or anger for her daughters and readers alike. Although the book mostly focuses on the March daughters, Marmee’s empathetic and pragmatic wisdom proves essential to their development and renders her a worthy mentor for readers.

3. Mansfield Park by Jane Austen

As Austen was a clergyman’s daughter, it makes sense that many of her books include clerical couples. This novel includes three clergy wives, each of whom has a besetting sin that masquerades as a virtue. Mrs. Norris is a frugal lover of money. Mrs. Grant is an amiable enabler. Even the protagonist, Fanny Price, is prideful; what appears to be humility may be crippling self-obsession. Populated with complicated characters, this book offers an exercise in self-examination.

4. Pride and Prejudice by Jane Austen

Mr. Collins is one of the most unlikable yet well-known characters in literature. Bumbling and obsequious, he’s not exactly an ideal husband or pastor. However, Charlotte Lucas sees value in him that others don’t. Through decisive action, she makes them a happy home and enjoys a sense of peace that eludes characters driven by passion. Charlotte teaches readers that contentment is often a matter of choice.

5. North and South by Elizabeth Gaskell

Gaskell, also a minister’s wife, reveals that a pastor’s wife has the power to make her husband’s burdens bearable or unbearable. When Mr. Hale leaves the ministry over a crisis of conscience, his wife does her utmost (by doing her least) to make matters worse. Mrs. Hale is worth examining as a cautionary tale, particularly when compared to her steadfast daughter, Margaret.

6. Gilead by Marilynne Robinson

In this memoir-style novel, an aging pastor faces the end of his life and worries about leaving his young wife behind. Shy and uneducated, Lila Ames doesn’t host Bible studies or potlucks. However, she models gentle determination as she fulfills and cherishes her foremost ministry: encouraging her husband.

My list of pastors’ wives in literature continues to expand, but these six novels are a wonderful entry point. As we navigate life and ministry as pastors’ wives, we must prioritize real relationships. Still, I hope you’ll also take advantage of the rich fellowship available to you on your bookshelves: the authors and characters who sit ever ready to offer advice, warnings, humor, and comfort.

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