Parenting can feel like an endless attempt to hang on for dear life as the weeks go by. Children change; the culture changes; the demands of work, extended family, and church ebb and flow. Kids don’t come with instruction books, and there are as many opinions about child rearing as there are people in this world. How can we do this parenting thing well?
You’ll often read in quality Christian parenting books that sanctification is at the heart of parenting well. The four books I survey here are no exception. There are many education philosophies, methods of discipline, and options for teaching biblical truth. Results are never guaranteed. But the best chance we have of raising our children into godly adults is to seek to model godly attitudes and habits before them.
At the same time, each child is unique, each situation is distinct, and each stage of development is different. We need practical ideas to help us succeed in this grand adventure of parenting. These four recent books provide spiritual and practical encouragement for loving your children, no matter their life stage.
1. Loving Your Adult Children: The Heartache of Parenting and the Hope of the Gospel by Gaye B. Clark (Crossway)
There are a lot of resources for parents at the various childhood stages, but much less has been written about loving your kids once they grow up. Gaye Clark’s brief book helps to fill that void.
Some advises trusting God for the outcome of our children’s lives and pursuing basic sanctification. She reminds us that “our horizontal relationships, adult children included, are best cared for by pursuing our vertical relationship with God.” But Clark also provides helpful counsel for dealing with an increasingly common situation: the estrangement of adult children from their parents. She provides practical advice for trying to mend relationships, however they were broken. This is an important book in a time when it seems family relationships are especially strained.
2. Reaching Your Child’s Heart: A Practical Guide to Faithful Parenting by Juan and Jeanine Sanchez (New Growth Press)
The best parenting advice comes from people who have been through it before. They can remind you of the deep theological truths about parenting that frame your daily actions. They can also share examples of their successes and failures to show you that perfection isn’t attainable.
Results are never guaranteed. But the best chance we have of raising our children into godly adults is to seek to model godly attitudes and habits before them.
Above all, Juan and Jeanine Sanchez “want to encourage you to parent with eternity in mind.” Take a deep breath, look at the problem before you, and try to remember parenting isn’t about getting kids to bed on time or making them do their chores well—it’s fundamentally about pointing them toward the God who made the heavens and the earth.
No matter how things appear to be going, the Sanchezes remind readers, “God has given you everything you need to be a faithful parent.” That includes Christ, Scripture, the Holy Spirit, and the church. This book blends practical advice for various stages of parenting with theological encouragements to parent well for God’s glory.
3. Parenting with Hope: Raising Teens for Christ in a Secular Age by Melissa B. Kruger (Harvest House)
Every stage of parenting has its own challenges. I look back and wonder how I managed the toddler years in my home. Yet I’ve found parenting teenagers to be the most emotionally and spiritually challenging. Melissa Kruger’s book Parenting with Hope offers godly advice for those trying to grow in their sanctification as they help their teenagers mature socially, emotionally, and spiritually.
The book begins by laying out a basic plan for family life built on prayer, biblical thinking, and local church involvement. Kruger then reminds parents that scholarship, extracurricular engagement, and popularity are potential idols for both teens and their parents. Finally, she argues helping teens thrive requires offering appropriate acceptance, parental availability, and familial affection. At the heart of the book is Kruger’s belief that “Jesus is the reason we can parent with hope.”
4. What Do I Say When . . . ? A Parent’s Guide to Navigating Cultural Chaos for Children and Teens by Andrew and Christian Walker (Crossway)
Discipling our children is a multidimensional project. We should focus on catechizing them doctrinally so they understand Christianity’s deep truths. But discipling our children ethically is also a key parental task, especially because our culture is constantly shaping their moral imaginations contrary to truth.
Andrew and Christian Walker team up to provide a tool for answering your children’s questions and starting age-appropriate conversations to explain what Scripture says about hot-button issues. The book touches on topics like human dignity, identity, technology, and political engagement. Each chapter provides a concise overview of biblical teaching, basic theological truths that undergird each topic, and suggestions for how to the manage the conversation in three different levels of complexity. This resource will help educate parents as they faithfully raise their children in a rapidly changing culture.
The Gospel Coalition