With prevailing cultural narratives defining pleasure as the ultimate good, sexual activity as essential to identity, and the self as the locus of authority, it’s no surprise we encounter individuals in our local church ministries and other Christian contexts who are confused about what are good sexual desires and acts. In marital and premarital counseling contexts, questions about sexuality and the permissibility of various sexual acts recur.
Perhaps the issue that causes the greatest confusion for both single and married people centers on the permissibility or impermissibility of masturbation, by which we mean a personal sexual act for the purpose of self-pleasure, or what’s sometimes referred to as self-stimulation.
God’s Purpose for Sex
The biblical-ethical framework of sex begins with the triune God who, in his goodness, creates the good physical world. Humans, by God’s created design, are sexual beings who are commissioned to use their sexuality for the glory of God.
But humans aren’t merely sexual beings, and their identity isn’t centered on their sexual expression. Moreover, their sexual desires on this side of Genesis 3 aren’t inherently rightly ordered. The new-creation Christian joyfully lives in the freedom of Christ, led by the Spirit, pursuing the goodness of God’s design. This freedom and being led by the Spirit entails passionate pursuit of God’s good physical gifts and joy-preserving restraint from deviations from his created goodness.
Being led by the Spirit entails passionate pursuit of God’s good physical gifts and joy-preserving restraint from deviations from his created goodness.
Christians experience constant pressure from prevailing cultural narratives that argue all sexual expression, so long as it doesn’t harm another, is inherently good and that sexual expression is the foundation of one’s personhood. Christians, thinking through the ethics of sexual acts such as masturbation, are sometimes confused when cultural narratives collide with biblical ethics.
Essential Rubric
Our intent is to provide a compelling biblical and pastoral argument that the best rubric for Christian ethical decisions about sex isn’t merely “Does the Bible forbid it?” but rather “Does the act fulfill the explicit purposes for which God created sex?” When the biblical evidence is considered, we argue that masturbation is never a God-honoring act.
In contrast to those who evaluate the morality of masturbation within the context of psychology and human development, we approach the question within the framework of how God in his wisdom designed sex.
Consider three diagnostic questions and their answers.
1. How does masturbation fit within the covenantal nature of marriage?
God created sex as a means for individuals within the marriage relationship to relate to one another. Masturbation, in contrast, is an overtly nonrelational sexual act. Moreover, where sex within the marriage relationship is altruistic and other-focused, masturbation by nature focuses only on the self. Scripture repeatedly warns against having a selfish heart. Paul commands believers to “do nothing from selfish ambition” (Phil. 2:3), while James warns that the presence of selfishness in one’s heart leads to “disorder and every vile practice” (James 3:16).
With such a negative view of acting from selfish motives presented in Scripture, it’s impossible to imagine how masturbation doesn’t fall short of God’s design for marriage. Because masturbation focuses sexual desire for a self-benefit, rather than the benefit of one’s spouse, one might rightly argue it’s a form of adultery—giving to another what should only be given to one’s spouse. For these reasons, masturbation cannot fit within God’s design for covenantal marriage.
2. How does masturbation fulfill the purposes for which God created sex?
In addition, masturbation doesn’t fulfill any of the three main purposes of sex. First, masturbation obviously isn’t procreative. The inclination to legitimize masturbation is part of a larger cultural denial of the purpose of sex. Todd Wilson comments, “Our culture has separated the act of sex from the purpose of sex. We have severed the connection between sex and its power to unite lives and create life, so that now, virtually everywhere we look, sex is separated from its uniting and procreating purposes.”
Furthermore, masturbation isn’t unitive because it privatizes sexual activity that’s designed to be shared. Matthew Anderson notes the inability of masturbation to fulfill God’s good design: “Human sexuality is inherently social, and masturbation is not. In that sense, it represents a failure to fulfill the nature of Christian sexuality as God designed it.”
Finally, while it’s true that self-stimulation may bring intense physical pleasure, it doesn’t achieve moral sexual pleasure. Sexual stimulation practiced in isolation from one’s spouse was never God’s design.
3. How does masturbation relate to God’s command to be holy as he is holy?
Lastly, masturbation falls short of God’s call for believers to “be holy, for [God is] holy” (Lev. 19:2; 1 Pet. 1:16). God calls believers to be certain kinds of people—individuals formed according to the image of Jesus Christ. As we become new creations in Christ through the work of the Spirit, we reorder our disordered loves. Before our loves are completely reordered, however, we find that at times our flesh is driving our conduct.
As we become new creations in Christ through the work of the Spirit, we reorder our disordered loves.
Paul captures this idea in his letter to the church at Philippi when he describes the “enemies of the cross of Christ. Their end is destruction, their god is their belly” (Phil. 3:18–19). Apart from Christ and the power of the gospel, people are controlled by physical desires. In contrast, there’s a repeated call for Christians to be characterized by self-control, regardless of one’s marital status: single, married, or widowed. Paul similarly exhorts his readers to be imitators of God (Eph. 5:1).
Those who attempt to make “Christian” arguments for the permissibility of masturbation do so on the grounds that it’s possible to separate masturbation from activities that are clearly prohibited, such as lust and pornography. But even if the activities are divisible, masturbation is still categorically impermissible because it runs contrary to the moral purity of God’s holy nature.
It’s impossible to imitate God’s self-giving nature while focusing solely on oneself. And in the vast majority of cases, masturbation involves lustful thoughts. Moreover, masturbation creates ungodly sexual tendencies and expectations in which a person assumes sexual fulfillment should be on demand to meet his or her own immediate needs. Consequently, masturbation also falls short of the character and holiness to which God calls everyone to walk.
For these reasons, it cannot meet any of God’s purposes for sex or for marriage, and it runs contrary to God’s moral character—so we conclude masturbation can never be a God-honoring behavior.
The Gospel Coalition